I’m mad at my friends who have two kids. Why you ask? Because they never gave me any insight into how much harder/suckier the second pregnancy is than the first. I refuse to think it’s just me who have noticed these glaring differences.
So for all you ladies who are thinking about having another, here are some hard truths (because I’m a good friend and will tell you):
- Weight Gain. Like instant weight gain. There’ no delay like the first. Your body has already made the epic shifts, so it’s old hat to have that belly pop. And thighs. And ass. Not to mention you don’t have the luxury to go to the gym every night since you have baby numero uno at home.
- Veins. I had NO issues with weird vein things my first time around, but this one! I’ve got fun little splotches making themselves known on my feet and ankles. Not cool body-circulation-system. Not cool.
- Bowel Movements. I’m not going into any detail here except to say “stool softner”
- B.I.T.C.H. Yep. I wrote it. I wrote it because hormones make you a raging one. Again, since none of my so-called-friends told me any of this, I don’t know if these mood swings are due to it being my second, or if I just skipped this part with the first. In any case, I’m sorry Jason.
- Tiredness. This was way worse for the first five months (yep, not just the first three like with your first). And it’s the this total body, wrap me in a blanket, put a fork in me because I’m done, type of tired.
- Swelling. Again, something I didn’t have with Cole, but most mornings I wake-up with fingers that would make Oscar Meyer proud.
- Non-nesting. I looked back at where I was in the whole nesting thing with Cole at this point in my pregnancy. I had the nursery painted. Clothes washed in Dreft and hung neatly in the closet. Baby book started. Infant diapers purchased. Books read. Named picked out. Hell, I was even talking to my stomach. This go ‘round. We still have an air mattress in the nursery, old books, a space heater, some random purses, about 5,001 wire hangers from the dry cleaners and unknown stains on the carpet. This poor kid is already getting the shaft and he’s not even born yet!
Wow. That was cathartic.
As much as I complain, there are some things that are better the second go around.
- Clothes. You already have prego clothes from your first 9-months of chunkiness so you don’t need to buy too much.
- Time flies. I’m already in my third trimester but it feels like I just peed on a stick yesterday!
- Peace of mind. You have more of it since this ain’t your first rodeo. You take things more in stride and you’re not calling your doctor with every little nuance.
- Understanding. This is mainly from your significant other. I feel like they understand what you’re going through, and what a horrific-event you have to look forward to (labor for those who didn’t catch that. New baby/birth is amazing. The act of getting that pumpkin out… not so much), so there’s a deeper level of “looking the other way/biting ones tongue”. For that, I’m grateful.
I’m sure there are more things that are lovelier this go around… but probably not. I’ll just count my blessings that through all of this, I’ve had a strong stomach, a high pain tolerance, low glucose levels, perfect blood pressure, a kick-ass kid who understands that he can’t form-tackle mama, and a healthy munchkin in my stomach that likes to do the polka during client meetings.